For many people, the holidays are a time of celebration, lights on every corner, shared meals, and spending time with people we love. But for others, this season can bring up feelings of heaviness, loneliness, or emotional exhaustion. You’re not alone if the holidays feel harder than they look. According to the American Psychological Association, nearly half of adults report heightened stress during the holiday season, and for some, it can also trigger sadness or anxiety that lingers well beyond the new year.

Part of this comes from the pressure to make things “perfect.” We often feel we need to show up with endless energy, stay cheerful, and keep everyone else happy even when we’re running on empty ourselves. Financial strain, complicated family dynamics, or the ache of missing someone can make the holidays feel like a balancing act between appearing joyful and managing what’s really happening inside. And when routines get disrupted such as sleep, exercise, or eating habits, our bodies have a harder time keeping up. Nearly two out of three people with pre-existing mental health conditions say their symptoms worsen during this time.

On a deeper level, our brains are simply trying to keep up. The prefrontal cortex, the part that helps us plan, regulate emotions, and make decisions, gets overworked by the constant “to-dos” and emotional demands of the season. When that happens, our body and brain shifts into stress mode: we may feel tense, on edge, or disconnected. Sometimes this looks like snapping at loved ones, withdrawing from plans, or numbing out to get through the days. These are human reactions to overwhelm, not signs of weakness.

If you’re running on empty this season, it’s okay to let go of the pressure to make everything picture-perfect. Maybe “good enough” really is enough. A smaller get-together, takeout instead of a big dinner, or a night in with your favorite movie with loved ones can mean just as much as any big celebration. The people who care about you don’t need everything to be flawless. They just want you to show up as yourself. If it all starts feeling like too much, talking with a mental health professional can help you take care of yourself and get through the season a bit smoother.

The holidays don’t look the same for everyone and that’s okay. They can be full of joy one moment and frustration the next. It’s normal for feelings to shift, sometimes multiple times in a single day. Choose what feels peaceful and meaningful, even if it looks different from everyone else’s version.